Esteemed Gentleman of the Dojo,

I would like to apologize for my absence of late as a new job and other stuff and my new found skill of Bizarro Techie has landed me in the dark ages for tech advancements. I am still trying to figure out my new superpower of the ability to remove technology advancements out of my life.......I'm sure the reason for my powers will be revealed to me sooner or later but for the time being I am just accepting that I am supposed to be on a sabbatical from the Internet and TV.

Question: How hooked on TV/Internet are all of you? Do you freak out when it takes a bit longer than usual to download a site? Do you get annoyed waiting 3 minutes during commercial breaks?

Well, let me introduce you to my life as of late. I went through a dark period after I crashed 2 laptops back to back with no computer for 2 WEEKS! I got so desperate I got a library card..........I felt like a dirty old man surrounded by little kids an moms at the library....but hey 55 minutes of FREE Internet access. Just enough time to finish some work emails. Then.......when the hallelujah moment arrived and my laptop came back to me......the next day BRIGHTHOUSE networks was digging stuff up in my lawn and cut my cable. I have been without Cable TV/Internet access at my house for going on 2 WEEKS! Yes, I have not seen the newest Curb or Entourage...........and YES I have not had the pleasure of watching Sportscenter for about 2 weeks at home. And, I am still waiting for Brighthouse to figure this out. What is a guy supposed to do?

Well, I guess I will take it as a blessing in disguise as it has given me plenty of time to reflect on my life path and on how I should draft a WR this year in fantasy football. Yes, I vow to actually have a WR that scores a point for me in a game, something I just realized was my "Achilles Heel" not only last season but the last 3! Watch out league....this little sabbatical has turned me into a superhuman! Let's just hope I have corralled the real use of my bizzaro tech skills by the time the NFL season gets underway.

So, Be thankful you have all of modern technology at your fingertips and remember this guys tale before you get angry at a slow download.